Last updated: January 2, 2024
Confidence can be a tricky thing, but it’s something that you want to hold on to pretty much every aspect of life. If there’s one area that you really do want to hold on to your confidence, it’s in the bedroom with your partner. The thing to remember is that nobody can be completely confident 100% of the time.
Not even the sexiest person in the world has complete confidence. You can do all the right things and you can buy the beautiful chemise that you saw when you were shopping, But confidence doesn’t come from an item of clothing. It comes from you.
The bedroom is the one place where you want to feel comfortable and confident in your skin, and you want to feel sexy all the time, no matter what. Let’s take a look at how you can gain more confidence in the bedroom.
- Start thinking about yourself the way you think of others. A great way to make yourself feel more confident is to start giving yourself the compliments that you would give other people. So if you would tell your friends that they are beautiful or they are sexy, then it’s time to turn that inward and start telling yourself. Look for women who use body positivity on social media and start following these influencers instead of people that make you feel inadequate or imperfect in any way.
- Start putting your mind into the gutter, not out of it. A good portion of decent confidence in the bedroom comes from your mind, not your fight. If you are constantly thinking about sex and you are using sexuality, then you’re going to feel that in every fiber of your being. Being mindful and present during the deed is really going to help. So make sure that you’re remembering that your partner is likely not looking at any of the imperfections that you’re stressing over, and they’re thinking about how they can make you feel good. So force yourself to focus on what’s actually happening in front of you and keep your mind into that gutter.
- Say no to negativity. Think back to Eat, Pray, Love: she asks her friend when a man has ever turned her down when she’s naked. Her friend says that’s never happened before. Now remember yourself: Has that ever happened to you? Not very likely. Instead of comparing yourself to other women or making yourself feel bad by thinking things that haven’t even happened. Start saying no to those negative thoughts and start pulling positivity from every fiber of your being.
- Talk to your partner. If you are feeling insecure in the bedroom or you are lacking confidence, talk to your partner about it. Not only will it mean that they want to do more to make you feel confident between the sheets, it will bring you closer together to have an open conversation. Most partners who want you to be as happy as they are will think about how they can make you feel good.